LIFE HEAD-ACHE

Not a migraine head-ache.
A life head-ache.

The numbing,deadening hum of Life sends ants crawling up my taut nerves..
How can something so alive and full of life like Life feel so dead and hollow...and barren like a dried-up river bed?

Before the zero-ness set in,Life seemed so full of life (on the surface).

But then I happened to look beneath the surface and found a gutter so black and slimy with slippery worms of myriad perversions that I didn't want to peep in any more than I had already had.
I closed the lid on the man-hole of life which i had so accidentally stumbled upon and foolishly opened....promising myself never to think again of the ugliness I had glimpsed..

But there is no cure once you have witnessed it...there is no healing...all you can do is assimilate the ugliness and push it away into some dark corner of the soul where it can (hopefully ) stay benign without casting a shadow on "Life After The Witnessing"!

But it has tainted my view of the world.
I now see the world in all its murky,filthy glory!

I see the facade I put on to be "this" or "that"..I feel nauseous of my "image-consciouness"!..I puke internally at the masks all of us wear..I do not see a single mask-less person leading a normal life!

The scorn behind the sweet smile,
The immorality behind the moral cloak,
The lack of culture behind the culture,
The crudeness behind the sophistication...

ITS ALL TOO CLEAR..(as clear as the simmerng desert under the blazing sun)...My clarity of vision when I peeped into the gutter has done me in...clarity of vision can be hideous..beware!