Monday, May 12, 2008

DESTINATION UNKNOWN

Sitting in the train,next to the window,with the wind blowing on her face she felt strangely calm...
A calmness she did not deserve to feel...after all,she had broken the rules of an all-powerful ugly,hypocritical society..

She had no idea of her destination..she wasn't sure if she wanted to get anywhere in the first place..

She was only sure of Him..(yes,she was sure of Him but she wasn't so sure about the nature of their relationship...she didn't see him as a friend..friends are too distant when one needs them and too close when one doesn't need them....she didn't see him as a lover..lovers don't love,they control..they have a "to-do"list ready for you..a list that moulds you into an identity-less zombie..by the time you are through the list love has jumped out the window and become a cripple.....she didn't see him as a brother...brothers see their sisters as saintly,pure creatures incapable of doing wrong..the sisterly moral facade one has to put on is tiresome to say the least...so what did she see Him as????...)

She called him on his mobile,he was travelling in the same train...she felt strangely weepy hearing his voice and couldn't speak...her silences always spoke more clearly than her words ever could..he said he'd come over to her compartment...but he couldn't because the compartments were not connected...each compartment was self-sufficient in itself and detached from the others..

He came in at the next stop and sat next to her..sensing her restlessness he took her hand in his,as if to calm her.

She laid her head on his shoulder...she felt peace,im-measurable peace!..if they could make this feeling last,she would leave behind all that she had left behind a hundred times over!

She wanted to begin life anew..to get away from the condemning people of her town,to lose herself in the crowds of the big city...but could she start on a clean slate?..however big a city is a lady who breaks the rules of a conventional society is singled out for stoning...there seemed no way out really.

She slept resting her head on his shoulders...when she woke up they had reached their destination.

He took her to his small flat in a dilapidated building....he seemed to be sorry to have brought her to a worn out flat...she told him she didn't care for luxuries, nothing else mattered if they could hold onto the vague relationship they had formed.

His mother came forward to greet her...the hostility in her eyes was palpable..she was on trial for leading the son astray..the mother left after conveying what she had to without saying a word.

His aunt and sister were next in line..they looked through her like she was non-existent...it was late in the night,they mentioned they were all set to sleep(indirectly asking her to leave).

She could see that all this was upsetting him...he was upset thinking she was upset..she was upset because he seemed upset!

As they came out of the building,she said a quick good-bye to him..she wanted to ruffle his hair to see him smile in the unique way that he did,only he could smile like himself..but she didn't..

She gave him a hug..a hug which conveyed a sense of finality..they both knew it..it was the end for them.

As she walked away to her two-wheeler in a daze,the world looking hazy through the film of tears pouring down her face,not daring to turn around and look at him,she felt his hand on her shoulder...his eyes met hers...yes,they would be together after all...he wouldn't let her go away alone..he couldn't let her go away alone...they would be together after-all...away from all but together.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

good one, thanks for your comment, felt happy. :)
vibha

vibha reddy said...

heyy, can i have ur e-mail id.. i am so much encouraged by ur comments, thanks a ton.. do mail me
at j.vibha.reddy@gmail.com

thanks a ton again
vibha